Hmmm... where to start this post?
Ran into an old friend in Target yesterday (like how I blog about something more than 24 hours after it happens? lol). Friend might be a loose term, but I'd like to think that at some point we were friends, and not just acquaintances because I was dating one of his close friends... but either way... haven't seen him in probably almost two years. Maybe more like a year and a half, because I broke up with this particular boyfriend two years ago. Anyways... it's been a while since I've seen him and a lot has happened in life since then. More so in his life than mine because mine is pretty boring and monotone. He's getting married next weekend. This isn't a shocker because I'm friends with him on Facebook and I saw when he got engaged. It is a bit surprising that it's so soon because he just got engaged in April. But maybe I'm just used to knowing people who are engaged for a year or longer before the actual ceremony. But in today's society people get married quickly for one of two reasons: either the girl is knocked up, or they actually want a speedy engagement. More commonly than not an engagement is fast because the girl is pregnant and they want the child to be "legitimate" when it comes into the world.
But after speculating (and snooping/stalking) I'm pretty sure this isn't the case in his situation. So props to him and his fiance for knowing that what they have is right and not wasting time with details. I really am happy for him, although slightly jealous. But then again, not jealous. He deserves it. He's been through a lot, and when he was my age I think he felt just as depressed and alone in love as sometimes feel now.
With that being said, I had a very strange dream with my ex in it last night, most likely because I ran into this old friend and it brought to mind my exboyfriend. I've had dreams about him recently, and they're almost the same tone. He and I are back together and I'm not happy about it. I usually spend most of the dream trying to figure out how to break up with him again. Last night's dream was a bit different. In this case he cheated on me but still wanted to be with me and I couldn't stand looking at him. In one part of the dream I actually snuck out of his house so that I didn't have to be with him, and then I got on a plane which turned into a bus. The part I remember most clearly was the seats on the bus were more like airplane seats and the window were more like portholes. I was sitting in a seat by the window listening to my ipod (at least I think it was an ipod, the layout was slightly different) and he came and sat down beside me and pulled out one of the earbuds that was lodged in my ear. Then I woke up. Random? I didn't eat anything right before bed last night, promise.
Went over all of this information with Becky at my massage today and she said she thinks its normal that even after two years I still dream about him. She said it's normal to still wonder about him and hope that he's doing okay. I'm not sure I sit around hoping he's okay (as horrible as that sounds). I'm curious about him because I want to know if he actually got the motivation to do the things I was trying to motivate him to do. One thing I can NOT stand is people who want something and then do nothing to go get it. If you don't like your job go out and get another one. If you want to go to school to make more money, find a way to do it. If you don't like living at home with your parents: fix it. I understand this is easier said than done, but don't complain night and day about these problems and then sit around and think it's impossible to fix. So I'm not curious about him in hopes that he's doing better. I have very little faith in thinking he's changed his situation, but I ask to be sure. Does this make me a mean person? Possibly. But there you have it. I have enough drama in my own life without trying to support someone else's dysfunctional family drama.
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